i thought you were losing it

Yeah, so it's been awhile since i updated, but what are you going to do other than a.) never take a final as a Utica College student again! b.) pack my bags and go to Ireland! c.) dig myself out of this huge hole that i'm buried in! That last one didn't really deserve an exclamation point but i thought i'd be consistent.

Life has just kind of mustered on these past few weeks, barely even gaining my attention. I just feel i'm at the brink, just waiting for what's next. And what's after that and what's after that. I know it seems a little toxic, this constant sense of wonder of where my life is taking me, how it will transform...if it will transform. I am the catalyst for change, I read somewhere. I think it was my wall.

This sadness that seems to creep up on me, with no rhyme and no reason, (okay maybe a little bit of reason), just sucks the life right out of me. But today isn't much different than any other winter day...it reminds me of the house in Under the Tuscan Sun by Frances Mayes, it was called Bramasole...brama meaning to yearn for and sole, the sun. In fact, I've been reading her two books about Tuscany for the past months and i just fall further and further in love with that wonderful European lifestyle...chock full of siestas ("an invitation to your thoughts, reading a book..."), mercati (markets) and a relaxed way of living indulgently on the best things in life like food, wine, friends. Not to mention they have universal healthcare!

How's that for a segue into my plea that whoever reads this blog is indebted to watch Sicko, Michael Moore's somewhat new documentary about the lovely healthcare system here in the good ol'  US of A. As grotesque as Michael Moore may be, and how truly American he really is, he's got some statistics that will turn you into Rain Man almost instantly. You'll become compulsively cautious of avoidable accidents.  The point of is you want to avoid getting all caught up in the shit institution of insurance companies and hospital bills and don't want to be chopping fingers off and then have to choose which one you can afford to have sewn back on its stump. Just check it out to see what i'm babbling on about.

In speaking of avoidable accidents, erin and i were tuned into Pop Up Video and learned randomly from a bubble in Cyndi Lauper's Girls Just Wanna Have Fun video that about 4,000 people are injured by teapots annually. How does that make you feel? My initial impression was, wow, that is really shocking. But i guess things like this happen.