It's hard to keep up with this thing when I don't have the convenience of internet at home. Can't believe it's May already...it's been one year since we returned from the Land of Ire, I'll be turning 24, and taking the plunge in less than four months. There's already WAY TOO MUCH wedding stuff going on. I'm not just talking about mine, because in the meantime Travis and I have to get readay for his sisters' wedding July 4th weekend.
We've both really considered eloping at this point. There is just too much stress involved with us and our families right now that it's getting very hard to breathe, so to speak. My mom's mental condition is worsening, and I know I cannot blame her for it but I fear what shit might hit the fan on my big day. Will she throw another misguided fit? Spew a bunch of lies in front of my new family? The sheer thought is too much to handle, but my hands are tied. I cannot force her to take medicine.
And on his side, I have hard time trying not to blame my soon-to-be-mother-in-law, because she has no mental illness. Just a penchant for being extremely tightly-wound, nosey, and rude to Travis...which I find odd, because in my experience I've found moms that love their sons a little too much...anyway. The problem lies that our wedding is not until September and it's in the backyard of the house we rent from his parents. Oh, and Travis is graduating in a week. So we could've been getting ready to make the move...and now, I guess we're just getting ready to try and stay still just a little longer.
The question is: to move or not to move? I've visualized the pro & con list a dozen times in the last month...pro: not living near our moms. con: not living near our dads. pro: a fresh new start. con: the shitfest that is moving. Well, I guess I can't decide on how far I'm comfortable moving. He's looking in Arkansas and Oregon, NYC and hopefully not D.C. I want to get away, but I'm flipping terrified.
*biiiggg looonnnnggg ssssiiiigggghhhhh*
plus I've been avoiding updating because no noose is good noose, right?
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