Friday, January 21, 2005

Not Another Teen Entry

I know you all hate who I've become. And I know what you are all thinking.

Just another angry teenager.

But what will you say when I'm no longer a teenager? Will you still be able to call me rebellious? And without that, what other ways do you have to silently criticize me for who I am?

I'd say I'm sorry I'm not like the rest of you, but I am not. Being different is the easy part, putting up with il crapola is the hard part.

So I dress different and I have piercings in places you'd never even think to be pierced, my music is eclectic and I shun any idea of mainstream. I am a drop of water next to the waterfall.

My opinions don't match up with yours so you denounce my ideals. I like to consider myself open minded so I accept yours, no matter how much they conflict with everything I stand for. To each thier own.

Growing up, in likeness with time, are the two things that never stop happening. And both are equally against you. It doesn't get any easier, I hear.

I used to think family were the most important people you'd ever come into contact with. They are your blood, a big part of who you are. But no matter how well your DNA and blood types match up, it never means how well your personalities will match up. It's hard to see eye to eye when you have to look up at who is looking down at you. And when the person you look up to is looking down on you, one cannot find much resolve.

Like tonight.

Not fitting in is where I fit.

 

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

There is nothing more hurtful than being told that you're wrong, just because your views, likes, dislikes, whatever, stray from the family party line.  Was told that all of my life.  Got to the point where I simply shut up and shut down rather than be hurt all over again.

And the memory still hurts, but I don't shut up or down anymore.  Because I finally learned that if given the choice to please them or to please myself, I choose me.

Choose you.

~~ jennifer

Anonymous said...

Marissa!
No one hates you for who you've become!
We stick around because we like you for who you are!
Kathleen